2016 absolutely sucked, not just because we had, what felt like, twice as many bad films as usual, but more celebrity deaths than one can count and the UK and US trying to out-do each other in the “see who can make the worst political decision ever” competition. But alas, we are here just to talk about the films we had this past year, and usually I would stick to top 10 lists but it seems 2016 was so prolific I had to go for dreaded top 20’s instead of 10’s; not sure if that means the year was extra good, or extra bad.
TOP 20 BEST FILMS OF 2016
I’ve heard wonderful things about Moonlight, Patriot’s Day, Manchester By The Sea and Silence but they are yet to come out in UK just yet, so don’t go thinking they’re not on the list because I didn’t like them or any such nonsense, I just haven’t seen them so I can’t comment. Either way, here are my personal favourite films of 2016, if you don’t like them – tough!
- Everybody Wants Some!!
- The Girl With All The Gifts
- Moana
- Café Society
- Anthropoid
- Hush
- The Neon Demon
- Brotherhood
- Deadpool
- Zootopia
- 13th
- Finding Dory
- Hell Or High Water
- Arrival
- Deepwater Horizon
- Captain America: Civil War
- Batman V Superman: Dawn Of Justice – Ultimate Edition (I’m not sorry)
- Rogue One: A Star Wars Story
- American Honey
- I, Olga Hepnarova
HONOURABLE MENTIONS
The Conjuring 2
Midnight Special
Sully
Hail Caesar
Doctor Strange
DISQUALIFICATIONS
These titles were released in 2016, but IMDB, for whatever reason, decided to count them as 2015 releases, I choose to put them in their own list not to put them down but rather as an excuse to include as many good films as possible, if I included them in the main list I would have to remove some other titles already on there, and even if the disqualifications are better than those films I would have to take off the list to make room, I would still rather do it this way so none are left out, honourable mentions are difficult enough to pick out.
Knight Of Cups
Eye In The Sky
Son Of Saul
Green Room
The Witch
BOTTOM 20 WORST FILMS OF 2016
Now for the other list, the 20 movies this year that made me question my existence and hate myself for sitting in front of as they played out, like I said before, this was a bad year for films, I tried to keep it to 10 slots but it couldn’t be done, better luck next year.
- Dirty Grandpa
- The Boss
- Fifty Shades Of Black
- My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2
- God’s Of Egypt
- Allegiant
- Pete’s Dragon
- The Choice
- Alice Through The Looking Glass
- Ice Age: Collision Course
- Mother’s Day
- The Other Side Of The Door
- Swallows And Amazons
- Equity
- Me Before You
- Ballerina
- Dad’s Army
- Nine Lives
- Norm Of The North
- Miracles From Heaven
NOTE – Miracles From Heaven is the worst film of the year for me because, despite not having production values as horrid as some of the other films on the list, religious propaganda just rubs me the wrong way, especially when it’s as arrogant and pompous as this and not just badly made (which it is).
DISHONOURABLE MENTIONS
The Boy
Risen
Now You See Me 2
Keeping Up With The Joneses
The Forest
BEST LINES IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER
*Everything he says* – Ryan Reynolds in Deadpool
“I need to get her out of me” – Bella Heathcote in The Neon Demon
“Be careful not to choke on your aspirations, director” – James Earl Jones in Rogue One: A Star Wars Story
“To commit suicide you need a strong will, my child. Something you certainly don’t have” – Klara Meliskova in I, Olga Hepnarova
“If God is all powerful, he cannot be all good, and if he is all good, he cannot be all powerful” – Jesse Eisenberg in Batman V Superman (again, I’m not sorry)
“I hope he comes all over your car!” – Sasha Lane in American Honey
“You’d think there were ten of me” – Ben Foster in Hell Or High Water
“I am just a dumb bunny but we are good at multiplying” – Ginnifer Goodwin in Zootopia
“Never tell a soldier he does not know the cost of war” – Alan Rickman in Eye In The Sky
“Suck it, bipeds” – Ed O’Neil in Finding Dory
TOP SURPRISINGLY GOOD PERFORMANCES
Shia LaBeouf in American Honey
Gal Gadot in Batman V Superman
The Rock in Moana
Jamie Dornan in Anthropoid
Jai Courtney in Suicide Squad
Aaron Taylor-Johnson in Nocturnal Animals
MEMORABLE SCENES
Darth Vader rebel massacre – Rogue One: A Star Wars Story
Church shootout – Anthropoid
Granny’s peach tea – Batman V Superman
Airport royal rumble – Captain America: Civil War
Alone at the morgue – The Neon Demon
Truck murder – I, Olga Hepnarova
Bye-bye baby – The Witch
They arrive – Arrival
Alan Rickman’s final scene – Eye In The Sky
The pit – Son Of Saul
FAVOURITE SOUNDTRACKS
Hans Zimmer & Junkie XL – Batman V Superman (notably “Is she with you” & “This is my world”)
Cliff Martinez – The Neon Demon
Johann Johannsson – Arrival
Robin Foster – Anthropoid
Opetaia Foa’i, Mark Mancina & Lin-Manuel Miranda – Moana
Michael Giacchino – Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (I know some people aren’t too fussed, but I most certainly was, especially the track “Your Father would be proud”)