Phil’s 5 Worst Films of 2017

Phil’s 5 Worst Films of 2017

2017: In Review Quick Review Year In Review

So 2017 is almost over and it’s that time a year again where everyone reflects back on their best and worst films of the year.

So first up… the 5 WORST films of 2017.  And, as always, there were quite a few to choose from..

 

Stinker of The Year: Fifty Shades Darker (2017)
In Brief: It’s so bad it’s not even fun. Yup Fifty Shades Darker takes off where 50 Shades Of Grey finished – mostly bad script writing, score core S&M and some Movie Channel poor acting. It’s totally amateur and I’m beyond gobsmacked that they made this film, let alone the upcoming sequel. Lets be honest if a film can beat a Michael Bay Transformers film to Worst film  it’s pretty bad.

 

 

 

2. Transformers The Last Knight
In Brief: Another year this would have romped it home, but few things can beat Fifty Shades in a shit film contest.  That said Hopkins slumming it, more Marky Mark and a pointless nonsensical story get’s pretty close.

 

3. Assassins Creed
In Brief: Video name adaptations don’t come more asinine than this. It’s dull, it’s silly, it makes no sense and you stop caring after a few seconds.

 

4. Underworld Blood War
In Brief:  The Underworld films have always been little more than OKAY but Blood War was a case of flogging a very dead horse.

 

5. The Mummy (2017)
In Brief:  CGI strewn humourless Pants… The Mummy is a hot mess of a film that even the usually robust star power or Cruise couldn’t save. It’s just terrible.

 

6. The Circle – Boring Netflix drivel

7. Power Rangers – Pointless

8. A Cure For Wellness – Pretentious, long and dull

9. Leatherface – A film you didn’t need or want

10. Hacksaw Ridge – Nice to see Mel back but this was just jingoistic war porn.

Dis-Honourable Mentions: King Arthur Legend Of The Sword , Live By Night,  Sing! , The Boss Baby, The Dark Tower , The Limehouse Golem,  Justice League 

 

The 2017 Films I just couldn’t Finish: Sleepless, The Ghoul, The Lost City of Z

Phil’s Top 5… Disappointing films of 2017

Phil’s Top 5… Disappointing films of 2017

Other Cr*p Top 5

Each week Phil, from Phil’s Quick Capsule Review, takes a look at a different movie or TV related Top Five.  This time out:  The Top 5 Disappointing films of 2017

 

5 – The Dark Tower

I dint hate this but in a year that brought us IT and Gerald’s Game, this should have been SO much better.

4 – A Cure for Wellness

Lots of hype.  So little delivery.

3 – War Machine

War Machine just lacked bite.  For a satire it lacked, well Satire.  Pitt was good but the film was just to mainstream.

2 – King Arthur: Legend of the Sword

King Arthur was a mess.  Richie can be hit and miss but the cast, trailer and even concept was great.  But studio messing and a lack of vision just led the final film to be half the film it should have been.

 

1 – The Mummy 

It was never going to be Shawshank but Tom Cruise is usually pretty reliable.  Shame then that film (a “Universe film” that sunk the universe it was set to create) was  total disappointment with a messy script.  One to avoid.

 

 

Phil’s Best & Worst of 2017… So Far! FINAL Edition (1st December 2017)

Phil’s Best & Worst of 2017… So Far! FINAL Edition (1st December 2017)

All Things Film Blog Other Cr*p Year In Review

So this is my semi-regularly updated of the BEST and WORST of 2017’s movies, as well as the best films I missed from last year and the Phil’s Quick Capsule Review Sharknado Award.

This will be the LAST Edition until our final end of year Wrap up.

All in my very humble opinion…

 

BEST Films Of 2017… So Far:

  1. Baby Driver (9/10)
  2. T2 Trainspotting (9/10)
  3. Paddington 2 (9/10)
  4. Raw (9/10)
  5. OJ: Made In America (9/10)

Honourable Mentions:

Blade Runner 2049 (8/10), La La Land (8/10), IT 2017 (8/10); Thor: Ragnarok (8/10), Shot Caller (8/10); Dunkirk (8/10), Spider-Man Homecoming (8/10), Logan (8/10), Prevenge  (8/10), Logan Lucky (8/10), Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2 (8/10), Counterpunch (8/10), Jawbone (8/10), Silence (8/10), Hidden Figures (8/10), War For The Plant of The Apes (7/10), Wheelman (7/10), Happy Death Day (7/10)

 

WORST Films Of 2017… So Far:

 

  1. Fifty Shades Darker (2/10)
  2. Transformers The Last Knight (2/10)
  3. Sleepless (3/10)
  4. Assassins Creed (3/10)
  5. Underworld Blood War (4/10)

 

Dis-Honourable Mentions:

The Mummy (4/10), The Circle (4/10), Power Rangers (4/10), A Cure For Wellness (4/10), Gaga: Five Foot Two (4/10), Leatherface (4/10), Hacksaw Ridge (5/10), King Arthur Legend Of The Sword (5/10), Live By Night (5/10), Sing! (5/10), The Boss Baby (5/10), The Dark Tower (5/10), The Limehouse Golem (5/10), Justice League (5/10)

 

The 2017 Sharknado Award for Films So Good (!) They Cant Be Rated:  

2 Lava 2 Lantula & Sharknado 5: Global Swarming 

 


The 2017 Films I just couldn’t Finish…

 The Ghoul, The Lost City of Z

Great Films Of 2016 That I saw In 2017:

The Edge Of Seventeen, The Girl With All The Gifts, Train To Busan, Deepwater Horizon, Kubo & The Two Strings, Sing Street, Hunt For The Wilderpeople, 13th,  I Daniel Blake

 

 

Phil’s Best & Worst of 2017… So Far! 5th Edition (12th October 2017)

Phil’s Best & Worst of 2017… So Far! 5th Edition (12th October 2017)

Quick Review Year In Review

So this is my semi-regularly updated of the BEST and WORST of 2017’s movies, as well as the best films I missed from last year and the Phil’s Quick Capsule Review Sharknado Award.  All in my very humble opinion…

 

BEST Films Of 2017… So Far:

  1. Baby Driver (9/10)
  2. T2 Trainspotting (9/10)
  3. Raw (9/10)
  4. OJ: Made In America (9/10)
  5. Blade Runner 2049 (8/10)

Honourable Mentions:

La La Land (8/10), IT 2017 (8/10); Shot Caller (8/10); Dunkirk (8/10), Spider-Man Homecoming (8/10), Logan (8/10), Prevenge  (8/10), Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2 (8/10), Counterpunch (8/10), Get Out (8/10), Jawbone (8/10), Silence (8/10), Hidden Figures (8/10), War For The Plant of The Apes (7/10)

 

WORST Films Of 2017… So Far:

 

  1. Fifty Shades Darker (2/10)
  2. Transformers The Last Knight (2/10)
  3. Sleepless (3/10)
  4. Assassins Creed (3/10)
  5. Underworld Blood War (4/10)

 

Dis-Honourable Mentions:

The Mummy (4/10), The Circle (4/10), Power Rangers (4/10), A Cure For Wellness (4/10), Gaga: Five Foot Two (4/10), Hacksaw Ridge (5/10), King Arthur Legend Of The Sword (5/10), Live By Night (5/10), Sing! (5/10), The Boss Baby (5/10)

 

The 2017 Sharknado Award for Films So Good (!) They Cant Be Rated:  

2 Lava 2 Lantula & Sharknado 5: Global Swarming 

 

Great Films Of 2016 That I saw In 2017:

The Edge Of Seventeen, The Girl With All The Gifts, Train To Busan, Deepwater Horizon, Kubo & The Two Strings, Sing Street, Hunt For The Wilderpeople, 13th,  I Daniel Blake

 

 

A Cure For Wellness – A Quick Capsule Review

A Cure For Wellness – A Quick Capsule Review

Quick Review

Phil’s Quick Capsule Review:
Gore Verbinski isn’t a terrible director.  He can handle visuals, gets good performances from his cast and can make a compelling film.  Sadly over the past 10 years or so he’s felt like a Michael Bay in waiting. Be it the pretty terrible Pirate films to the pretty terrible Lone Ranger, he’s delivered more than his fair share of junk.  A Cure For Wellness falls very much in that category. Visually stunning, well made and yet totally vacuous and pointless and man its long.  SO long. Simple put: save your life for something better.

Best Bit: Dane DeHaan is good.

Buy, Stream, Avoid: Avoid

If You Liked this Try:  The Long Ranger, Get Out, The Autopsy Of Jane Doe

IMDB Rating: 

 

Author: Phil Hobden

Phil’s Best & Worst of 2017… So Far! 4th Edition (July 28th 2017)

Phil’s Best & Worst of 2017… So Far! 4th Edition (July 28th 2017)

Quick Review Year In Review

So this is my semi-regularly updated of the BEST and WORST of 2017’s movies, as well as the best films I missed from last year and the Phil’s Quick Capsule Review Sharknado Award.  All in my very humble opinion…

 

BEST Films Of 2017… So Far:

  1. Baby Driver (9/10)
  2. T2 Trainspotting (9/10)
  3. Raw (9/10)
  4. OJ Made In America (9/10)
  5. La La Land (8/10)

Honourable Mentions:

Dunkirk (8/10), Spider-Man Homecoming (8/10), Logan (8/10), Prevenge  (8/10), Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2 (8/10), Counterpunch (8/10), Get Out (8/10), Jawbone (8/10), Silence (8/10), Hidden Figures (8/10), War For The Plant of The Apes (7/10), Wonder Woman (7/10),

 

WORST Films Of 2017… So Far:

 

  1. Fifty Shades Darker (2/10)
  2. Sleepless (2/10)
  3. Assassins Creed (3/10)
  4. Underworld Blood War (4/10)
  5. The Mummy  (4/10)

 

Dis-Honourable Mentions:

The Circle (4/10), Power Rangers (4/10), A Cure For Wellness (4/10), Hacksaw Ridge (5/10), King Arthur Legend Of The Sword (5/10), Live By Night (5/10), Sing! (5/10), The Boss Baby (5/10)

 

The 2017 Sharknado Award for Films So Good (!) They Cant Be Rated:  

2 Lava 2 Lantula 

 

Great Films Of 2016 That I saw In 2017:

The Edge Of Seventeen, The Girl With All The Gifts, Train To Busan, Deepwater Horizon, Kubo & The Two Strings, Sing Street, Hunt For The Wilderpeople, 13th,  I Daniel Blake

 

 

A Cure For Wellness – Motion Picture Maniac

A Cure For Wellness – Motion Picture Maniac

A Blog Motion Picture Maniac

For the majority of Gore Verbinski’s career I feel like I’ve been the only one really trying to give the guy a break, I don’t think he’s as bad as people keep making out, even after years of pondering I still can’t quite figure out why everyone has such a problem with the second and third entries in the Pirates Of The Caribbean series, I’ve read every review, listened to every rant and I still don’t get it, Mouse Hunt may be stupid but that doesn’t change the fact that I still find it hilarious to the point of gut rupture and was The Lone Ranger really that bad? I’m sorry but I don’t think the words “worst film ever” are all that appropriate for a film that ends the way The Lone Ranger does, I mean that train scene was great.

So yeah, I like his not-so-popular stuff, kinda doubles the sadness factor for me a bit since I found A Cure For Wellness to be a rather dull and surprisingly ordinary affair that failed to justify its 18 rating, its length or even its entire existence. It’s not a terrible film, I hesitate to even call it a bad one; I just found it really disappointing and forgettable. The story follows a young business executive played by Dane Dehaan who is pretty much blackmailed by his superiors into taking a trip to the Swiss Alps, there he must retrieve the company’s CEO who was supposed to be away on a spa vacation for only a few weeks but appears to have lost his mind and refuses to return, so this young man arrives at the peculiar “wellness centre”, where the guest couldn’t be happier and the staff couldn’t be stranger, not realising that very dark times lie ahead as he learns more and more about the centre’s mysterious past and finds himself unable to leave.

Lot’s of people have been referring to this film as disgusting, weird, creepy, strange and different, even the negatives reviews appeared to be promising a film I would enjoy, but no, I didn’t think it was any of those words just listed. First of all, how on Earth did this get an 18 certificate, did the BBFC believe the suggestion of violence or disturbing content was enough to justify it? I don’t think so, there is some suggestive material and some blood but I’ve seen 12A’s with more gore than this. OK I’ve had my rant about that, now for the more important stuff. The story feels like it has been designed to highlight the set pieces and anything concerning plot or character is just filler to connect the dots, to stitch it all together, it’s a shame because on their own, these set pieces are not poorly made, they’re well acted, shot with personality and the whole thing contains some very creative camera angles but because of how the film is plotted out they come across as dull.

The first ten minutes are rather uncomfortable, there’s a lot of cutting back and forth to the past and the present that probably made sense to the filmmakers as they were planning how it should open but I disliked how choppy it felt, I’m especially shocked to say that the CGI wasn’t even that good, for a Gore Verbinski movie that’s a slap in the face, I mean I’m sure there’s CGI I didn’t notice, like maybe it was used to improve some of the backgrounds and landscapes but there’s a car crash involving an animal that did not look good at all. Normally when a film has a choppy narrative, people like to put it down to style over substance, so does A Cure For Wellness have a nice style? Well… yes and no, it would have had a nice style if the really fussy editing didn’t prevent it from coming to fruition, this may sound nit picky but during some dialogue scenes the camera feels like it’s cutting around for no other reason than to include as much of the footage they shot as possible, which is what a lot of film students do.

So is this a bad film, no, I wouldn’t say that, but I also wouldn’t say it’s weird or different like everyone has been saying, I found it really unspectacular and not unusual in any way, the acting is perfectly fine, I like the imaginative camera angles and the set design is absolutely grand and deserves much praise, but there’s too much exposition, horrifying scenes come of as silly or comical, whether or not they were meant to be I have no idea, the story feels like it’s wandering aimlessly until a set piece comes along to make a big thing of but when they happen they’re really not that interesting, the third act is extremely repetitive and that CGI animal was rather embarrassing if I’m honest. I would recommend it be seen though, it’s ambitious and there is a spark of brilliance to be found, it’s a splitter, the kind of film you’ll either like or dislike, I know some people who did like it and heard several testimonies from those who did not.

That’s why I feel the need to give it 5 stars instead of 4, because maybe some of the things I disliked are my fault rather than the film’s, I really wanted to like this but it did too many things to turn me off, I must say it’s been a long time since I was on the negative side of a polarising film, this doesn’t feel right in the slightest.